Thursday, June 3, 2010

I am not in a good place at the moment ..

.... kind-of stuck!!!

I have needed to go and see a clinical psychologist ... yes ... me .. of all people!! The one who does yoga, gyming, caring ...

As I walked through the door .. I thought .. wow - couch .. tissues next to couch ... armchair for her .... but I was there - yesterday !

Very long story ... but all in nutshell .. she asked me whether I had written all this stuff down .. that's going on in my head.

No .. I haven't! Why not, she asked ... (It's just like the movies ... she sits ... you taught .. she takes down pages and pages of notes ...) Do I get advice on howto fix it .. a quick fix .. NO !!!

I told her, amongst so many other things about my Mum and how I have accepted the way she is and it was obviously blogging about it helped. A blog she said ? You have a blog? She was surprised!

Clinical psychologists don't talk much either (kind-of disturbing as all you want are answers!) so when the blog word came up .. her eyebrows when up and she smiled - that's good, and how does it help you.

Mmm that's another thing they say ... how does that help you, how do you feel about that ...... ..... .... I have never been asked questions like before.

So I here am .. in this dark place at the moment .. trying to be normal again and trying to find my way back - and hopefully quickly as I don't have time for all this nonsense :) .... and am writing down what I feel ... 'cos that's what she told me to do !!

Soooo ... to my lovely bloggy friends out there - bare with me .. I will be back to normal in no time !! But you may get all sorts of 'stuff' on this blog for a while (with the odd photo, of course!).

And ... you even get HOMEWORK from clinical psychologists !!! I have to right down 'stuff' (she has even given me a specific subject!) for my next session next week. Homework never ever goes away .. no matter old you get !!!!

To my hubby and my children .... MWAH ... MWAH .... I love you lots !!!

11 comments:

  1. I think we all need to see one of those for some reason or another. Bit its true that all we all want is for somebody to give us some answers and direction.
    In a way you are already writing everything down, so all you need to do is a cut and paste job.

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  2. Oh Avril! I have been worried about you and wanted to send you a message on FB last night, but my laptop is so slow, I couldn't get anything saved! Thinking of you lots, and you're going to be just fine. You're doing the right thing and we're all pulling for you big time! Take care of yourself and we MUST do coffee soon! Special hugs! xxx

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  3. Firefly - if I knew how to cut and paste from a blog I would :) but she's asked for specific 'homework' !! :)
    Janet - thanks so much - that means so much to me!

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  4. I'm always happy to hear when people do take up the services of any psychologist because everyone nowadays need to talk to someone sometime in their lifes.

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  5. Avril I am your blogger friend and will support you how every I can from here....
    I know its not you, and the YOU will be back...It will.
    Its actually so scary when one's life runs away from you and you feel you have lost all control...but it comes back..you need time and writing all about it helps.
    I promise I have written all about my MS journey and it helps me...
    One day I feel good and the next I could be a miserable cow...but I need to say it as it is and not how I think others want to hear it.

    So take all the time you need to heal you....you are the most important person and know your family loves and needs you as well...

    Am sending you lots of love and light - FEEL BETTER SOON MY FRIEND.

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  6. Thinking of you lots and lots. It will all seem like a bick muddle now but in time things seem to come together. Hang in there!!!!! Lots and lots of love

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  7. Now this is a subject I know allot about. :)

    They don't say much hey?... but always leaves you thinking.

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  8. Huge HUGS Mom!! Very very glad you're starting to blog about it :)
    And I LOVE that photo, it's just perfect

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  9. Good for you....we all need to talk to someone now and then....you know we're here for you....
    Hugs from Texas...

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